In the Tao Te Ching, Laozi offers profound guidance for daily living, often using the metaphor of water to illustrate the ideal way of being. As he writes in Chapter 8:
The highest good is like water.
Water gives life to the ten thousand things and does not strive.
It flows in places men reject and so is like the Tao.
This simple observation of water’s nature provides a template for how we might live our own lives with greater wisdom and effectiveness. Let’s explore how to embody these principles in practical ways.
The Way of Water
Water teaches us several fundamental principles that we can apply to daily life:
Seeking the Low Places
Water naturally flows to the lowest points, yet from this position of humility, it nourishes everything above it. In our lives, this principle suggests that true power often comes from taking the lower position—not from weakness, but from the strength that comes with humility.
When faced with a conflict at work or in relationships, consider taking the “lower position” by listening more than speaking, seeking to understand rather than to be understood. This isn’t about being submissive but about finding strength through humility.
Gentle Persistence
Water is soft and yielding, yet it shapes mountains and carves valleys. As Laozi observes:
Nothing in the world
is as soft and yielding as water.
Yet for dissolving the hard and inflexible,
nothing can surpass it.
In practical terms, this teaches us to approach challenges with persistent gentleness rather than forceful confrontation. When facing obstacles:
- Instead of pushing directly against resistance, look for ways around
- Rather than forcing immediate changes, allow for gradual transformation
- Focus on consistent, gentle action rather than dramatic gestures
- Trust in the power of patience and persistence
Finding Your Natural Flow
Just as water always finds its natural path, Laozi teaches that we should seek to align ourselves with the natural flow of life. This doesn’t mean being passive but rather understanding and working with the natural tendencies of situations and people.
In daily life, this might mean:
Starting Your Day
Begin each morning by taking a few moments to sense the natural flow of your energy. Instead of immediately jumping into action, allow yourself to feel what needs to happen first, just as water naturally finds its path.
Making Decisions
When faced with choices, notice which option feels most natural and effortless. Often, our forcing and striving come from working against our natural inclinations rather than with them.
Dealing with Others
In relationships, observe how water adapts to whatever container it encounters without losing its essential nature. Similarly, we can remain true to ourselves while adapting to different social situations and relationships.
The Power of Emptiness
Laozi frequently connects the principles of water with the power of emptiness. As he writes:
We join spokes together in a wheel,
but it is the center hole
that makes the wagon move.
We shape clay into a pot,
but it is the emptiness inside
that holds whatever we want.
This teaching has practical applications:
Mental Space
- Keep some time in your schedule unfilled
- Allow for moments of quiet throughout your day
- Don’t feel compelled to fill every silence in conversation
- Maintain some emptiness in your living space
Emotional Flexibility
Like water taking the shape of any container, cultivate emotional flexibility by:
- Remaining open to different perspectives
- Adapting to changing circumstances
- Letting go of rigid expectations
- Maintaining inner spaciousness even in challenging situations
The Practice of Non-Striving
One of the most challenging yet liberating aspects of Laozi’s teaching is wu-wei, or non-striving. He illustrates this through water’s example of accomplishing everything without trying. In practice, this means:
Effective Action
- Notice when you’re forcing things and experiment with easing up
- Look for the natural timing of actions rather than pushing
- Allow situations to ripen before acting
- Trust in the power of minimal intervention
Natural Responses
Instead of rehearsing responses or planning extensively, practice:
- Staying present with what’s actually happening
- Responding spontaneously to situations
- Trusting your natural wisdom
- Letting go of predetermined outcomes
Practical Applications in Different Areas
Work Life
- Focus on contribution rather than competition
- Lead through support rather than control
- Allow projects to develop organically
- Maintain flexibility in plans and approaches
Relationships
- Listen more than you speak
- Adapt to others without losing yourself
- Allow space for natural development
- Support without controlling
Personal Growth
- Trust your natural development
- Don’t force insights or understanding
- Allow change to happen organically
- Practice gentle persistence
Dealing with Challenges
When facing difficulties, remember water’s example:
- Flow around obstacles rather than confronting them directly
- Maintain your essential nature while adapting to circumstances
- Trust in the power of gentle persistence
- Find the path of least resistance
The Art of Living Simply
Throughout the Tao Te Ching, Laozi emphasizes simplicity. Like water, which simply flows without complicated strategies, we can practice:
Simplifying Daily Life
- Reduce unnecessary commitments
- Clear physical and mental clutter
- Simplify decision-making processes
- Focus on what’s essential
Finding Natural Solutions
- Look for the simplest way forward
- Trust in natural processes
- Avoid overcomplicating situations
- Let solutions emerge naturally
The Journey of Integration
Integrating these principles into daily life is itself a practice in water-like patience and persistence. Start with small applications:
- Notice where you’re using force and experiment with easing
- Observe where you might take the “lower position”
- Practice flowing around obstacles instead of confronting them
- Allow for empty spaces in your day
Remember Laozi’s teaching:
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Take one principle at a time and explore it fully. Like water gradually shaping stone, let these teachings slowly transform your way of being in the world.
Living like water doesn’t mean becoming passive or weak. Rather, it means finding the incredible strength that comes from aligning with natural principles, maintaining flexibility, and practicing gentle persistence. In a world that often values force and control, this ancient wisdom offers a more effective and harmonious way of living.